girl, derailed*

i begin to doubt my judgments. it all ends in tear, and not so often happy smiles. i think i have commitment issues as well. i seem to lose my concentration in a millisecond. with a leap of faith, maybe, just so you know- i might finish something with persistence till the end. yes, that i admit, but mind you! i am serious with whatever i do. i just, loose the zest very fast especially when something annoys the hell out of me. then, the end.

what am i to do? cling on to dear life and work my ass off trying to get something i dislike done? i wouldnt, and couldnt, even if it would do so much as to save my life.

all the while, living under micro scrutiny is blood-suckingly tedious. macro scrutiny however, grant the scrutinized person much freedom to express and be understood. most of the time we take things simply by the surface knowledge. i, too, am most definitely included. but i try to see past that, and slowly let go of my own ego. then i see things better, and not put too much pressure on everything and myself. but seriously, still if things werent as good, better leave than be sorry for yourself in later days yah?