all it takes

...is acceptance actually. in everything. i realize that if i could slowly accept things that i dislike about myself, i could actually be happier and more relaxed about being me. if i could just accept what happens for the mere reasoning of why it happened in the first place, then i would have saved myself the pain of being angry and uptight about it. also, if i would just change whatever that should be changed--for the best, and just accept the rest of whatever that i couldnt change at the very least, it would make a big difference in terms of my own emotions and relationship with people around me.

all of these make sense, i guess there is always price to pay for understanding it now, maybe not sooner (because i need to learn the lessons), and not a lot later ( for it may be too late). but i guess it was all worth it, for the same reason and the only one happiness.

you could say that i have had a list of things that i wished was a lot different for myself. many things were actually illusions and stuff that media exaggerated over the years of me growing up, peer pressure and whats not. but i was glad that somehow i wasnt caught in the worst situations, not yet, and i hope that never happens though, since i am already writing about these now. anyways, i am glad to have had people in my life who were real and constructing to me. thank god.

all it takes, is just for me to open my eyes, and see...