get drunk

one should always be drunk. that is the great thing; the only question. not to feel the horrible burden of time weighing on your shoulders and bowing you to earth, you should be drunk without respite.

drunk with what? with wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you please. but get drunk.

and if sometimes you should happen to awake, on the stairs of a palace, on the green grass of a ditch, in the dreary solitude of your own room, and find that your drunkenness is ebbing or has vanished, ask the wind and wave, ask star, bird, or clock, ask everything that flies, everything that moans, everything that flows, everything that sings, everything that speaks, ask them the time; and the wave, the wind, the star, the bird and the clock will all reply : it is time to get drunk! if you are not to be the martyred slave of time, be perperually drunk! with wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you please.

i wish i am always drunk, with the beauty in life, soak up all the love-hate around me, and just be. im tired of playing guessing games what if, or will this be, or what next. i just want to be happy. but being happy should be simple and not having a wide open heart that allows for hurt and fear and anger. to justify my inability to be fully happy, i have it all. 

that is why.