welcome to my thoughts.

happiness. 

it is something that visits me quite often, but doesnt stay for long. there’s always something that ends the smiles and the laughter. i really wish negative thoughts couldnt trespass into my mind, but unfortunately, they do. all the time. worst of all, i cannot control them. they slip into my mind and stay there. they wait for me to deal with them. 

i want to focus on the bright things in life, but i cannot. that is the problem with me. i always need to fix every single issue in my life before i can be happy. sometimes that takes a really long time, which causes me to be temporarily upset. 

i know the right thing to do is to not worry, and just be happy. it is not as easy as it sounds though. everything gets to me. everything. i really wish i can be someone who didnt have a care in the world. im not that person though, and i dont think i ever will be.